Red Paper Heart
by CherBella
Summary: Edward has given up on Valentine's Day & having someone special to celebrate it with. Too many bad experiences have left him with only hatred for the day. But when he gets one very special valentine, will he be able to let his heart try one more time? AH
1. Chapter 1

**This was originally posted as an entry in the Twilight No Stress Love Fest, on LiveJournal**

**Prompt(s): **16. Lonely teachers shopping for Valentine's Day art supplies. One package of red construction paper. They both reach for it. Fingers touch. Sparks fly?

**Disclaimer: All Twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, Little, Brown, et. al. No profit was made and no copyright infringement is intended.**

**A/N: Big thanks to Naelany and OnTheTurningAway for creating this wonderful "Love Fest." :) It was great fun to write for, and to participate in. Also thanks to everyone who read and participated in the guessing poll. **

**If you haven't checked out the Love Fest stories yet, please do so, and please leave the wonderful and talented authors some review love. There were SO many wonderful fun and gushy and romantic and heartbreaking and vampy stories submitted. They were all fabulous! :) **

**community(DOT)livejournal(DOT)com/twi_love_fest**

**Also big thanks to urmistaken70 for pre-reading and providing the title! ;)**

**Oh and just in case you've made it this far and didn't notice the pairing, this is SLASH. :)**

* * *

**~~ * V * ~~**

FEBRUARY.

I winced as I flipped the calendar page, and the big, bold, red letters screamed out at me. The top page was teeming with red and pink hearts of all sizes, jumping off the page to taunt me even further.

Every year I dreaded this moment—the end of January. The moment we're forced into February. Most people hate January, looking upon it as nothing but cold, frigid winter weather. But really, January wasn't such a bad month—I chose to look at it as the birth of a new year, full of new beginnings and fresh starts.

And March—March was an optimistic month too, bringing with it the promise of spring and warmer weather soon to come.

I don't know who created the months and the modern calendar, but why they just didn't go from January to March, I'll never know. Why did they feel compelled to stick February in the middle? The whole month was like a weird afterthought squeezed in there. I mean, they didn't even have enough days left in the year to make it a full month—it only got twenty-eight days. It was like the teenager of the calendar year—not quite as mature as the other months. Except every four years when it grew an extra day, just like a big, red, teenaged pimple.

Its holidays were just as childish. Groundhog Day? Come on, really? A whole day celebrating an ugly rodent-like creature who may or may not see his shadow and therefore "predict" when spring was going to arrive. Now how crazy was that?

But Groundhog Day was, of course, not the big day everyone looked forward to in February. No, that would be the month's other insane holiday—Valentine's Day.

As my eyes slid down the calendar to the big red "14," I could feel my face muscles twitching into a grimace.

Valentine's Day. Some pooh-poohed it as a day manufactured by the greeting card and candy companies to sell more products and I certainly wouldn't disagree. No matter, it didn't stop millions of people—or perhaps I should say, millions of _couples_—in the world from celebrating it. All of those couples professing their love for each other with food and flowers and balloons and stuffed animals and sexy underwear.

I sighed loudly. I hated Valentine's Day. Not once in my twenty-six years had I ever had a happy one.

It all started in the second grade. This was before any "political-correctness" swept into the schools and kids were "strongly encouraged" to give every one of their classmates a valentine, so that everything was equal and no one was left out. No, when I was in school it was pretty much anything goes—at least along gender lines.

The room was a madhouse, all of my fellow classmates and I running around in circles stuffing our valentines into everyone's individual box. Then when it was all over we rushed back to our desks, sweaty and eager to dive in and see how many valentines we had received. Well, okay, admittedly, the girls in the class were way more excited to see their valentines than the boys. Most of the boys were more excited over the fact that now we could all eat the cookies and cupcakes that some of our parents had provided.

I was one of the few boys that actually opened my valentine box and opened each and every valentine . . . only to be crushed that I hadn't received one from Matt, my best friend. I didn't understand it. I'd given him one; in fact I gave him my favorite one, with Superman on the front. I had given a valentine to everyone in my class, even the stupid girls. Originally I just wrote ones for all the boys, but when my mom found out she sat down and very calmly explained how it wasn't fair that I was leaving out all of the girls, and surely there were some of them I wanted to give a card to, weren't there? (Now that I think of it, maybe it was my mom who started the PC rule of every classmate getting a valentine.)

So, I gave one to everyone, but the only ones I got were from the silly, twittering girls in the class. I managed to hold it together until I got home. I walked in the door and mom came rushing out of the kitchen to greet me, asking how the party went and I immediately burst into tears. When I finally was able to tell her through my sniffles what was wrong—all my valentines were from stupid girls—she did her best to console me but I could tell she was trying to bite back a giggle. I threw all the valentines into the trash and later when mom tried to give them back to me, I told her they were full of girl-cooties and I didn't want them.

The next year, third grade, Valentine's Day rolled around again. We had a new boy in our class that year— Bobby Bukowski. He had the biggest brown eyes and dark, shaggy hair. He was funny and easy to hang out with; all the kids liked him. And his parents owned the new ice cream shop in town so he was automatically cool. Everyone wanted to be invited home with him after school. But he invited _me_ the most. Of course, it was usually when he needed someone to do his math homework for him, but a triple chocolate sundae and the chance to be near him seemed more than an even exchange for a few multiplication tables.

Just like the year before, I gave everyone—boy and girl—a valentine. Bobby got my favorite valentine that year though. The next afternoon after recess, I was called to the principal's office. Bobby's parents were just leaving as I got there and they were giving me a funny look. When I went inside, my mom was sitting in the principal's office waiting on me. Turned out Bobby's parents had seen my valentine to him and they had gone to the principal to complain about how "inappropriate" it was—I had signed it "XOXO Love, Edward." I didn't understand what was wrong. He was my best friend and I liked him. All the valentines I got from the girls in my class were all covered with X's and O's and "I love you." Why weren't all of them being called into the principal's office?

Mr. Banner, the principal, seemed quite flustered and droned on about the appropriateness of what we say and do and how we need to learn to consider the consequences of things we write and say and how they might affect others, blah, blah, blah.

When mom and I were finally released, we stood there in the hall for an awkward moment just looking at each other. I must have still had a confused look on my face, because my mom quickly bent down and gave me a kiss on the cheek. She looked right into my eyes, with a sad smile on her face.

"Don't worry about what he said, baby, you spoke with your heart and there's nothing wrong with that."

And that was the first time in my life I realized I was different.

Mom never spoke another word to me about that day. The next year, though, she sat there with me and checked every valentine I wrote. She did it on the pretense of "helping me," by offering to put them in the envelopes for me, but I saw her sneak a look at each one before she sealed the envelope.

I'd learned my lesson though. I signed all the valentines—boy and girl—with nothing more than my name.

In a few years, when puberty started to hit, I realized just exactly why I was different. As all of the boys sprouted up and developed muscles and cracking voices, they also began paying more attention to the girls. Talking and joking about them incessantly—specifically, which of them were starting to grow boobs and wearing bras. And what it was like to touch said boobs. Eventually some of the guys started walking down the halls holding hands with some of the girls.

None of the girls in our school interested me and at first I thought it was just the specific girls themselves. Then one day, I was home alone and decided to sneak a look through one of mom's women's magazines, to see if I could figure out what was so appealing about girls. I flipped a page and there was a double-page spread ad for some perfume. Standing next to the half-clothed female model was a buff male model in nothing but a tight pair of briefs.

I got hard. _Really_ hard.

Finally, I knew why I was different.

I liked boys.

After that epiphany, I did what every gay boy does to survive.

I hid it for a while. I was quiet anyway, so it was east to get away with everyone just thinking I was shy and didn't date. I went on a few dates with girls when I was forced to by peer pressure, mostly double dates or group dates. When I couldn't avoid it, I played along with the typical teenage games of Truth or Dare or Seven Minutes in Heaven, kissing girls when required.

Senior year of high school finally brought my first boyfriend, at least for a little while. Peter and I were assigned to be yearlong lab partners in biology. Besides working together in class, we had to do all homework and any out-of-class projects together. Which led to a lot of time spent at each other's houses. In each other's bedrooms.

Peter had moved to town the year before and he was in the closet too. In the beginning it was exciting, having a secret relationship no one knew about. Eventually though, it became more and more frustrating, not being able to hold his hand walking down the hall, or not being able to even give him a quick kiss in public. I began to question why we were hiding this, to question what would happen if we came out. Every time I brought it up, Peter would quickly shush me up, either in pleading and begging tones or with kisses and touches, distracting me so he wouldn't have to talk about it.

The final straw was Valentine's Day. I was so excited to have a real honest-to-goodness valentine to buy a gift for and to spend the evening with. I assumed we would do something quiet together, just the two of us. But for some reason Peter wanted to go to the Valentine's dance at school. I protested because, obviously, we couldn't go together. We argued for days until finally, he broke down and confessed that his mom had been badgering him about why he never dated. She was pushing him to invite her best friend's daughter, Charlotte, to the Valentine's dance.

So, in the end, I gave in. He fixed me up with Charlotte's best friend, Bella. She was nice enough, but of course not the person I wanted to be holding in my arms. Having to watch Peter all night, across the room with someone else was bad enough. But having to watch him smiling at her, and whispering in her ear, and holding her close, while I was miserable and lonely was heartbreaking. If he was faking it, then he deserved an Oscar for that performance. I caught him looking over at me a few times and he looked contrite and apologetic, but it was too little too late.

The next thing I knew he was kissing her, and that was all I could take. I feigned food poisoning to Bella to explain why we had to leave. And then dropped her off at her house on the way back to mine.

I spent the rest of the disastrous holiday night alone in my room, ignoring Peter's hourly texts. I realized I couldn't and didn't want to hide who I was anymore.

The next day I told my mom and dad I was gay. Thankfully, they took it well. Mom with a few tears in her eyes but a smile of support, and Dad . . . well, Dad cleared his throat a few times uncomfortably and after a "Are you sure, son?" he seemed to accept it. Looking back, I'm sure they must have had suspicions ever since the valentine incident with Bobby Bukowski.

Although I didn't "come out" in any official way at school, I was no longer going to deny it, either, if anyone asked. Or go out of my way to pretend with any girls. Of course, it also meant I had to break it off with Peter. I told him I understood if he wasn't ready to come out, but that I couldn't be with him in the meantime. My heart was crushed when Peter chose to stay in the closet rather than be with me.

Luckily, I was soon off to college. Things were easier there. I met a few guys, went on some dates, even had a couple of short-term relationships. Still, every Valentine's Day that rolled around, I always seemed to be single. Alone. Forced to watch all the other people in love celebrating the day. And as if the point had to be hammered home that I had no "someone special" in my life, I worked part-time at a drug store and couldn't help but be smothered by the holiday. January had barely begun and we were already unpacking the heart-shaped boxes of candy and the teddy bears that bleated out "I Wuv You" when you squeezed them. February thirteenth was the absolute worst day to work and, lucky me, I somehow always seemed to pull that shift. Last-minute shoppers, (usually men) always desperate for whatever cheap card or bauble was left, desperate to have something to give to their loved one. I was never so grateful for February fifteenth.

Then, one day, I met Garrett. I'd been out of college about a year, working at my first (and current) job. We met through mutual friends—at Jake and his partner Seth's housewarming party. Garrett and I had an instant physical attraction and I ignored my better instincts about taking things slow. The sex was amazing and he was easy to be with. We moved in after only a few months together and by February we'd already been together almost a year. I couldn't have been happier. Except when Garrett worked late. . . or was in one of his moods . . . or constantly ignored my plans.

Yeah, looking back I should have seen the signs. But I was so happy to have someone in my life, I guess I overlooked a lot. Valentine's Day rolled around and I was over the moon to finally, finally, for real this time, to have my own "valentine" to celebrate with. I had all kinds of plans—cooking Garrett's favorite meal, some champagne and strawberries later…in the bedroom. I hurried home from school, anxious to get the food started and get everything else set up. Unlocking the door to our apartment, the huge bouquet of roses I was carrying blocked my view, but I couldn't mistake the loud groans and grunts and expletives I heard. I let the roses crash to the floor . . . and got a full view of Garrett's naked ass fucking some other guy over our couch.

So yeah, Valentine's Day and I were mortal enemies. I was done with any hope that I'd ever have a good one. As far as I was concerned, I'd rather sleep straight through the whole day. Wake me when it's all over.

**~~ * V * ~~**

I was still cringing at the calendar when I heard a little voice below me.

"Mister Cullen, I hafta go to the bathroom really bad!"

I swiveled my head away from the calendar of doom to peer down at the source of the voice, keeping that stern grimace on my face.

"Michael, we just took a bathroom break. You were supposed to go then."

"I did! But I hafta go again!"

I sighed and shook my head. From the first day of class in the fall, little Mike Newton had been the student that I knew was going to try my patience the most this year in my class of second graders. And so far, he hadn't proven me wrong.

"Okay, Michael, you may go. But you go straight there and then come straight back here okay? No wandering the halls, understand?" I handed him the hall pass, and he dashed out the door yelling an "Okay!" behind him.

"And don't slam—!" My warning came too late as the door crashed shut behind him.

**~~ * V * ~~**

A week later, I watched the last of my students file into the music room before I turned and headed toward the stairs. The next hour was a free period for me, but of course teachers never really have "free" periods. There's always something to prepare for, or papers to grade. Today I was headed down to the art room. All the teachers in the building were allowed to take supplies from the art room as long as it was for a legitimate class project with your kids. As much as I, myself, hated Valentine's Day, I still had to have the kids do something fun for the holiday. Usually I gave the kids a heart pattern to trace and then let them loose with the crayons and glue and glitter to make valentine cards to take home to their parents. On second thought, maybe I'd nix the glitter usage to avoid hours after school cleaning up the mess.

Even though Valentine's Day wasn't until next week, I wanted to make sure I had everything I would need for the project. I learned my first year that you had to get to the art room early before they ran out of red and pink construction paper. Because of my personal feelings toward the holiday, I had put off the concept of the kids making valentines until the day before, and when I went to get some paper for the kids, there was a huge barren spot on the shelf where the red and pink paper would have been. The next day was not a pretty sight—one man, alone in a room with twenty confused and upset second graders who vehemently let me know that hearts are _not_ green and yellow. I nearly had a mutiny on my hands.

As I entered the art room, I threw a quick wave over to Alice, our art teacher, to let her know I was there. In the middle of a class of her own, she just smiled and nodded back in greeting.

The supply room was fairly large with a second entrance door at the other end of it. I immediately headed for the shelves of construction paper, grabbing a good quantity of pink first. I heard footsteps and the presence of someone entering the room and, assuming it was just Alice, I didn't even bother looking up.

"Hey Alice, I'm just grabbing some paper for a project with the kids." Just as I reached up to grab a stack of red construction paper, my fingertips brushed the hand of the other person in the room, who was also reaching for the red paper. Except it wasn't Alice's hand. It was a male hand. My head whipped around to see who it was and I found myself looking at someone I didn't recognize. He had the most gorgeous baby blue eyes and curly blond hair framing his very masculine face. When he smiled at me, the dimples on his perfectly sculpted cheeks made him look like a grown-up Cupid come to life.

He pulled his hand away immediately, but my fingers still buzzed with the warmth of his brief touch. My hand was still resting on the stack of paper, and my lips started to move but then shut again, as I realized I was absolutely tongue-tied as to what to say to this modern day God in front of me.

Apparently my lowly human presence didn't affect him the same way, as he was quite easily able to find words.

"Oops, sorry about that, man." _He was apologizing for accidentally touching me, great. _

I managed to mumble a response. "Um . . . that's okay."

Suddenly he was holding his hand out again, this time in greeting. "I don't think we've met yet, I'm Jasper Whitlock. I'm Mrs. Cope's replacement."

Mrs. Cope was one of the fourth grade teachers, and had probably been here since the school was built. She'd finally retired at the end of December. I heard they had found someone to replace her, but obviously hadn't had a chance before now, to meet him.

His hand was still hanging out there in space so I had to get my brain back together and be polite to him.

"Hi, Edward Cullen, I teach one of the second grade classes. Welcome to Lincoln Elementary." As I grasped his hand in mine, the warmth burned again and engulfed my whole hand.

I was still just sort of standing there as he continued to speak. "So, red. Popular color this time of year. I was told it runs out quickly." He nodded toward the shelf and I finally broke out of my brief stupor.

"Oh yeah. And um, I can tell you from personal experience, the kids get mighty upset if there's no red paper for making valentines." I reached up again to grab what I thought I'd need for the class. As I did, I realized there were only a few sheets left. I frowned for a minute looking at the stack in my hand and the stack left on the shelf.

"Uh, I'm sorry…"

"Hey no worries, you were here first, you get first dibs. Besides I don't need much, I just wanted to decorate one of my bulletin boards." He had that kilowatt smile on his face again that was totally going to make me stupid if I didn't get out of there soon.

"Okay, um . . . well you might ask Alice, she might have more stashed somewhere. I, uh, need to get back. Good luck and again, welcome."

"Sure man, thanks, I'll see you around." He raised one hand in kind of a half-wave before turning back to the shelves of paper.

I high tailed it out of there and rushed back to my room, collapsing into my chair. My heart was racing but I convinced myself it was just from rushing back from the art room. It had absolutely nothing to do with the hot new teacher in our building. Nothing at all.

**~~ * V * ~~**

The next day, after delivering my kids to the lunchroom, I headed to the teacher's lounge for my own lunch break. I was just starting in on my ham sandwich, when I heard his voice.

"Is this seat taken?"

I gulped my bite of food down so fast, I almost choked. I looked up to see those blue eyes, those curls and that sexy smile. Jasper Whitlock.

"Um, no." I gestured toward the other chair, and he placed his lunch bag on the table before pulling out the chair to sit down.

"Thanks, Edward."

Silence passed for a few minutes as I stared at him and he began unwrapping his own lunch.

"So . . . you're Mrs. Cope's replacement?" _Duh, Edward, he said he was yesterday!_ I just had no clue where to start a conversation, now that I was stuck at the table with him.

"Yep. I've been subbing in the district since the fall, I figured I'd have to wait until the end of the school year or the end of summer before a permanent job opened up."

"Did your lunch hour get changed? I mean, we all have set lunch times and I've just never seen you in the lounge before." I was stammering, not wanting to appear too overeager to find out why he was here today.

Of course I'd caught him chewing a big bite of his sandwich, so all he could do is shake his head no until he swallowed and could answer.

"No, this is the time my regular schedule allows for. The first couple of weeks I was here I ate at my desk, while trying to catch up on Mrs. Cope's lesson plans and notes. And then the past two weeks, I was on lunchroom duty. Today has been the first chance I've had to venture forth to the lounge to meet any other teachers other than the ones on my floor." As his eyes scanned the near-empty room, his expression turned humorous. "I guess I wasn't missin' much."

There were only three other teachers in the room, beside us, sitting over at the corner table murmuring amongst themselves.

"Yeah, Tanya, Irina and Kate are a pretty tight clique, they always sit together and aren't really inviting of new people to join them."

Jasper threw his head back and laughed out loud. "So in other words, the teachers' lounge is no different than the students' lunch room, hmm? Everyone has their own friends and specific place to sit?"

He made a good point; I couldn't help but shrug my shoulders in agreement with him. And then suddenly that wide, gorgeous smile of his was trained on me again.

"Well, then I'm so glad I found you here today, Edward. Thank you for being so nice to the 'new kid in school' and letting me sit at your table."

I felt warm all over, but especially my face, so I knew I was probably blushing.

The next day I almost hid in my room for lunch, but I was afraid it would look too much like I was avoiding him. So I was late getting to the teachers' lounge, but as soon as I opened the door I saw him and my heart skipped a beat as he grinned and waved me over to the table.

Every day I both yearned for and dreaded the lunch hour. I looked forward to seeing Jasper because I liked him; he was smart, funny and seemed genuinely interested in learning as much about me as I was about him. And, I also dreaded the lunch hour because I liked him. Fucked up, I know. It's just that he would be so easy to fall for, and that just seemed way too dangerous. I mean, first of all, we worked at the same place—we were colleagues. We needed to remain professional at all times. Then there was the fact that I didn't even know if he was gay. He'd talked a little bit about his family but never mentioned a significant other, male or female. And then there was the fact that . . . well, I just didn't know if I was willing to put my heart on the line again. Even though my friends and family had been trying to get me "out there" again, the whole situation with Garrett had really done a number on me.

When Friday came, I was so glad to have a couple of Jasper-free days to not have to think about him. As the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch, we both wished each other a good weekend and went our separate ways.

Saturday, the two fifth-grade classes were going to the new Science and History museum about an hour away. The two fifth-grade teachers, Ms. Brown and Mrs. Becker had asked for extra chaperones so I signed up over a week ago. I had no plans this weekend so I didn't mind helping out.

I was sitting on the bus, reviewing the schedule for the day and the list of students in my group.

"Edward!"

_Oh no . . ._

I slowly looked up. "Jasper, what are you doing here?"

A huge grin spread over his face. "Well, same thing as you, it looks like. I couldn't pass up a chance to see the new History museum, so I signed up to chaperone. Hey, anyone sitting with you?"

_Oh God, it was the teachers' lounge all over again._

"No."

"Great!"

_Yeah, great._

I scooted over as close to the window as I could, but there was no escaping the closeness of Jasper. Sitting next to me. On a small bus seat meant for two young children, not two grown men. And Jasper was very fidgety.

The next hour was torture as Jasper constantly shifted in his seat, his thigh brushing my thigh, his knee bumping mine. His arm touching mine as he stretched his arms to make a point about something. My cock twitched every time it felt the spark from his contact, and I nearly broke out into a sweat every time from nerves. Nerves, because here I was on a bus trip with young children, as their _chaperone_, as part of my _job_, and I'm struggling to keep the bulge in my pants from being noticed. I could just hear the headlines now—

_Local elementary teacher loses job for lewd behavior on class trip. Film at Eleven._

When I wasn't focused physically on Jasper, I had to admit I actually enjoyed the trip a lot more because of him. He was a big history buff and he loved talking about it. He had actually double majored in college in history and education. When I asked why he wasn't teaching history at the high school or college level, he said he loved little kids and wanted to spend some of his career teaching them first. There was plenty of time to go the collegiate route later if he wanted.

There were other chaperones—parents and other teachers—on the trip, but Jasper and I were the only two male chaperones. When there was a scuffle at the back of the bus—two boys who were getting in a fight over a portable video game they were playing—Jasper didn't hesitate to jump up and take action, breaking the two up, using a stern but calm tone with them.

And at the museum, we had to separate, each taking our individual groups of students to different parts of the museum. But I caught sight of him once in one of the big gallery rooms—his face was alight with knowledge and his hands waving wildly as he clearly tried to relay some important historical event to his group.

Only talking to him at lunch, I had never had a chance to see him in action as a teacher and I was impressed.

As if I needed one more reason to like him.

The rest of the day went amazingly quick. I had a good group of kids and the museum was really quite interesting. Before long it was time for . . . the bus ride home.

Part of me was fearful Jasper would sit next to me. And part of me was fearful that he . . . wouldn't.

I should have known better, of course. When he climbed onto the bus, I actually saw him pause and look all around as if he was searching for something. When he found it, his face lit up in a big smile.

He was looking right at me.

The drive home was a test in control again for my body, but at least this time I knew I could go home when it was all done. After the last kid had been picked up, I sighed in relief and turned to head toward my car. Jasper called after me, but for once he paused, hesitant in whatever he was going to say. I told him I really had to get going and I swear he almost looked . . . disappointed? Instead we both did the quick "Have a good night, see ya' on Monday," type of good-byes.

I went home and jumped in the shower. My poor dick had been through so much today I knew I should just jerk off and be done with it . . . but I knew the first thing I'd start thinking of was Jasper and I just couldn't do that, it didn't feel right. I needed to get my mind off of him; he was my friend, my coworker, and nothing more.

**~~ * V * ~~**

_Strong fingers . . . stroking up and down my cock, swirling over the wetness at the swollen head…then down again, gripping, pulling. I groaned loudly, "Please, baby . . . please." Then I felt his soft lips surrounding me, pulling me into their wet, velvet-hot warmth, sucking me in hard until I felt the back of his throat. My hips began bucking uncontrollably. "More, oh God, more, harder . . . oh Fuck!" As I felt everything I had exploding out of me, I looked down to see blond curls and blue eyes looking back up at me . . ._

My whole body jerked awake, sweaty, my heart pounding. I felt a warm, stickiness and looked down to find my own hand in my boxers, around my cum-covered dick. I'd been jerking myself off in my sleep, no wonder the dream had felt so real, so vivid.

Damn. So much for not thinking about _him_.

**~~ * V * ~~**

Monday when lunchtime rolled around, I was sure it would be impossible to look at him and not think of that dream. My face was going to be red the whole time; he would surely know something was up.

As it was, I guess I was able to hide my thoughts pretty well. I kept quiet but he didn't seem to notice, he just made conversation as if everything was normal.

Meanwhile, the countdown to Valentine's Day was on. Thank God we were in the homestretch. Only four more days and then it would all be over for another year.

On Wednesday, out of the blue, Jasper asked me if I had any big Valentine's Day plans.

As an automatic reaction, I felt myself grimacing in the usual way whenever someone brought it up.

"Wow, that's quite a face!" Jasper exclaimed.

"Yeah, Valentine's Day and I don't get along too well."

His face contorted into a confused look. "Oh come on . . ."

"No." I stopped him. "I mean it, I've never had a good Valentine's Day and after the memory of last year's debacle . . . I'd just rather forget about the whole holiday."

Jasper frowned. "What happened last year?"

_Shit. Now I had said too much. Aw, hell . . ._

I couldn't believe I had just brought this up in front of him. For a split second I debated not telling him, but he had such a look of genuine concern on his face, as if he really cared.

I sighed. "Last year I was with someone, someone I thought I loved very much and I thought he loved me too. Until I walked in on him . . . with someone else . . . on Valentine's Day."

I'd just completely spilled everything. Not only about my experience with Garrett but also that I was gay.

My eyes slid slowly over to see his reaction. The frown was still on his face but his eyes had softened.

"Damn, that's . . . that is horrible Edward, I'm really sorry. But you shouldn't give up completely on the holiday or on love. There are better guys out there Edward. Ones who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated." His voice grew softer at that last part.

"Well, my only plan is to go home, pull the covers over my head and not wake up until the day is over."

We were both silent after that. Luckily the bell rang and I threw the remnants of my lunch in the trash as I hurried out the door.

**~~ * V * ~~**

Jasper never said any more about Valentine's Day, including nothing about what his own plans were. I tried not to think about what he might be doing; I was sure whatever it was, it would involve a perfect night with . . . someone special. Precisely why it was better not to think about it. Like I needed another reason to be depressed on Valentine's Day.

**~~ * V * ~~**

Friday finally arrived. February 14th. As I hit the alarm clock that morning and headed to the shower I just kept telling myself, only twenty-four hours to get through and then it will all be over.

Thankfully the kids made it go by fast. They were antsy and excited from the moment they walked in the door. I hadn't planned too much "heavy learning," today, knowing they wouldn't be able to concentrate long. After a few lessons, I pulled out the red and pink construction paper and glue and markers and let them go to town on making Valentine cards to take home to their moms and dads.

After lunch, we watched a video and then it was time for the party. A couple of the mothers brought in cupcakes and punch, and then the kids got to pass out their valentines. I had to admit it was fun to see the excitement on their faces.

I ended up with the usual pile on my desk of valentines and mini boxes of candy, all from the kids.

Once the bell rang and I had helped usher all of the kids out the front door and to their waiting parents or the bus, I finally exhaled. The big part of the day was over and I could finally go home and hibernate . . . alone.

When I got back to my room, I immediately noticed a new valentine on my pile. It was bright red construction paper cut in the shape of a heart, larger than most of the kids' store bought valentines, and hard to miss.

On the front it said simply _Be My Valentine_, written in marker.

Inside there was a hand-written message.

_Edward, _

_I know you've had bad Valentine's Days in the past, but I hope you'll let me change all of that for you. Please let me take you out for drinks and dinner? And for dessert . . . well, maybe we can see where things go from there . . . ?_

_It may sound cheesy and schmaltzy, but I really hope you'll be my valentine. Because I would love to be yours._

_Jasper_

Next to his name he'd taped one of those small foil-wrapped chocolate hearts, the ones that come pre-printed with various love messages. I didn't know if he had chosen the candy randomly or specifically, but the message on the heart, ironically, was four simple letters—XOXO.

I just sat there staring at it in shock.

"Looks like you got quite a haul there."

He was leaning casually in my doorway on his shoulder, hands in his pants pockets, ankles crossed.

I just stared at him.

Slowly he walked over to my desk and perched on the edge so that he was a little closer to my eye level.

"You're not saying anything, Edward, you're making me a little nervous here. I was sure the chocolate heart would seal the deal. " He was still smiling and trying to keep the mood light, but he did honestly look uneasy.

I still didn't know what to say. I was stunned that _he_ was asking _me_ out, that _he_ wanted to be with _me_. My heart was screaming _YES_, but my brain was holding me back, not sure I should take the leap again.

"Edward, don't let the past rule your life. Have some faith." His placed his hand over mine. The electricity sparked, as always. He leaned over so that he could whisper in my ear. I could feel the warmth of his breath on my neck and I had to bite back a groan at the tingle that went down my spine. "I know you feel this too," he said as his thumb stroked slow circles on my skin. "Let me give you the Valentine's Day you deserve, Edward…."

Oh if only this were any other day of the year, why oh why did he pick today to ask me out? The one day of the year I detested, the one day I always failed at. I didn't want to fail with Jasper. I opened my mouth to speak, the word "no" right there on the tip of my tongue . . . when out of the corner of my eye I saw the red paper heart still lying with the other valentines. My first _real_ valentine . . . from a boy . . . who liked me.

And I felt my lips turn upward into a smile as I heard myself telling him . . .

"Yes."

**~~ * V * ~~**

**A/N: P.S. **I _may_ add a couple of chapters to this so add me to your alerts if you want to see more of these two. :)**  
**


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: When I posted this story last year I got lot of requests wanting to read more about Edward and Jasper, to know how their date went, etc. I began to form ideas in my head for their future, but never seemed to find time for them in the writing schedule. As Valentine's Day again approached I thought today would be the perfect day to post the rest of their story. :)**_

_**If it's been a while since you've read ch. 1 I suggest re-reading, just to refresh your memory. There are some references in ch. 2 that make more sense if you remember ch. 1. :)**_

_**Also please forgive any mistakes, I've done my best, but it's been a rush to write and edit because I really wanted to post today. I'll be re-reading later to try and catch anything I missed.**_

_**Typical disclaimer: All Twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, etc. etc.**_

_**Happy Valentine Day everyone!**_

**~~ * V * ~~**

* * *

__

Buzzzzzzzzzz…

My nerves were so shot, my whole body jumped at the noise, even though I was expecting it. I stared at myself in the mirror as I tried in vain one last time to tame my crazy hair. There was already so much gel in it, any more and I was going to look like one of the greasers in the Outsiders. _Breathe, Edward, breathe. _I couldn't believe I was doing this. I was going out. On a date. On Valentine's day.

Jasper had completely dazzled me at work with the hand-made Valentine and his message. _"I know you feel this too," he said as his thumb stroked slow circles on my skin. "Let me give you the Valentine's Day you deserve, Edward…." _I found myself saying yes amidst a wonderfully warm glow in my chest.

But that was four hours ago. Once I got home and the warm glow left, I started regretting what I'd agreed to. I wanted to go out with Jasper, but this wasn't the best of days for me.

_Buzzzzzzzzzz…_

_Shit!_ I jumped again and raced to the door, pulling myself up straight at the last second and taking one more deep breath. _Here goes nothing._

"Hey Edward."

And there he stood, the complete opposite of me and my jangly nerves. He looked completely calm and collected, neatly dressed in a perfectly fitted black button-down shirt with sleeves rolled up, and dark rinse jeans that hugged him _very_ well in all the right places. But the best thing he wore was that smile, that smile that erupted across his face the minute he saw me, that smile that just radiated warmth and sunshine.

No wonder the warm glow was now back in my chest. And my breathing had slowed back down to normal.

"Hi Jasper," I felt my own facial muscles stretch into a very wide grin.

Jasper's eyes flicked down my body quickly, trying to be a gentleman and check me out before I noticed.

"You look . . . spectacular." His eyes were back on mine now. "Ready to go?"

I grabbed a jacket and made sure I had my wallet and my phone, then closed the door behind me and followed him down the outside walkway.

"Are you sure you want to do this? I mean all the restaurants are going to be packed and full at this late notice, there'll be long lines . . . I mean if we have to hit drive-thru or something that's okay with me, I promise."

"A drive-thru? On Valentine's Day?" Jasper grimaced. "No worries, I made reservations. We're good." He winked at me and I smiled back.

By the time I was in his car and buckled up, my brain caught up to his words. "But wait, even reservations at the last minute would be impossible to get on Valentine's Day."

Jasper paused as he was putting the key in the ignition, and for once his casual demeanor faltered. He turned to me with this sheepish look on his face. "Well . . . I might have made the reservations at the beginning of the week."

My heart plummeted and I leaned back into the seat, my hand already reaching to my seatbelt latch. "Oh. So what, your original date cancelled on you and at the last minute you thought, well what the heck, maybe Edward can fill in?"

Jasper's eyes widened. "Edward! Oh God no! Why would you . . . well I guess I did . . . Aw crap!" He turned and placed his hand on mine to stop me from unhitching my seatbelt and bolting from the car. "I'm sorry, Edward, I _did_ ask you last minute, that was my fault. I just thought the whole valentine thing would be cute. But I promise you were always the only one those reservations were meant for. Actually, I've been wanting to ask you out for weeks." He was smiling tensely, waiting on my reaction.

I was still processing the fact that he'd made the reservations so far in advance. For a date with _me_.

"What if I'd said no?" I whispered.

His smile got bigger. "Well, then some other lucky sap would have gotten my cancelled reservation and I would have been home on the couch eating Chinese takeout alone, watching some stupid TV show. Or some sappy Hallmark Valentine's Day movie, making me feel even more depressed that the hottest, sweetest guy in town turned me down."

Oh there was that cheesy grin plastered on my face again.

"Well, we'd better hurry then. We don't want to let that lucky sap get your reservations after all because we were late."

He grinned and straightened up in his seat and started the car. "Hell yeah!"

**~xo~xo~**

About twenty minutes later I was amazed as Jasper pulled up in front of my favorite Italian restaurant.

"Italian okay?" Jasper asked with a mischievous smile.

I tilted my head at him. "From my favorite restaurant, yeah I think it will be okay. How did you know?"

"We had that discussion a few weeks ago about our favorite restaurants, remember?" He winked at me again. "I listen well."

As we walked into the restaurant and followed the hostess to our table I just couldn't believe it. I was afraid I was walking in a dream and any moment I would wake up. Jasper had listened to me and picked this restaurant specifically because I liked it. Even when I was with Garrett, we always seemed to end up at places he liked.

"So what's good here?" Jasper asked as he opened his menu. I didn't even bother with mine, I knew what I wanted, so I easily rattled off several recommendations to Jasper.

After the waitress had walked away from taking our order, that nervy tingling feeling in my stomach came back. Jasper and I had shared many conversations and many meals together. But those were conversations as friends and colleagues, and those meals were lunches in the drab teachers' lounge, sitting across from each other at an old scratched up wooden table. Tonight we sat across from each other at a table covered with an elegant tablecloth and shiny silverware in a dimly lit restaurant with romantic music playing softly in the background. Tonight we were on a _date_—trying to turn our friendship into something more. And I hadn't had much luck in my life so far, with _something more_.

Jasper looked so calm and unflappable, he acted as if nothing was wrong, as if this was just another meal in the teachers' lounge.

"So did you have enough red paper for all of your students to make their valentines?"

I let out a breath of relief, thinking about how calmly the valentines project with the kids had gone this year. "Yes, thank God! Every one of them seemed quite satisfied. Not a peep out of them. How did your bulletin board decorating go?"

Jasper made the most awful face. "Yellow and green. Those little munchkins gave me hell! Over my freaking room decorations! That I did for _them_! _'Mr. Whitlock, you made the hearts wrong! Why are they yellow and green? Mr. Whitlock, hearts are s'pposed to be RED!'"_

Jasper was shaking his head in exasperation and I was nearly doubled over, I was laughing so hard. "I told you," I finally gasped out between my fits of laughter.

"I know, but geez these kids are merciless! I finally just told them the truth."

"The truth?"

"I told them it was Mr. Cullen's fault, that he told me hearts were yellow and green."

I stopped laughing and just looked at him. "And?"

"Oh, they completely understood then and I had them back on my side again. They rolled their eyes and put their heads in their hands and told me in very overdramatic fashion to never listen to Mr. Cullen." Jasper burst out laughing now and I was the one rolling my eyes. Most of the kids in his fourth-grade class were my former second-graders and clearly they had a memory like a steel-trap.

"I told you, those kids are vicious!"

Conversation with Jasper was so easy, I don't know why I worried. The rest of the meal passed by perfectly, he loved the food and he really seemed to be enjoying being with me as much as I was enjoying being with him.

We had just finished dinner and were waiting on dessert and coffee, when I noticed Jasper was distracted. He was even beginning to look a little disgusted. My heart skipped a beat, and the nerves came back again. Had I said something? Was Jasper regretting our date?

"Jasper, is everything okay?"

"No, it's not!"

My gut twisted and I almost thought I might throw my whole dinner up right there.

He leaned in over the table. "Have you noticed the lady with the roses has approached every single couple here tonight except us?"

I blinked as my stomach unclenched. He was mad at the lady with the roses? All evening one of the waitresses had been walking around the tables with a tray of roses, trying to entice the men to buy one for their female dinner companions. I had noticed her walking by on several occasions but hadn't given her much thought beyond that.

"Well . . . ." I searched for words as I was still puzzled at his reaction. "She . . . probably didn't see any reason to stop at our table."

"No she clearly didn't but maybe _I_ had reason for her to stop!"

She was across from us, just finishing up at another table, when Jasper made a very obvious wave to get her attention. She came over, smiling, but Jasper spoke before she could say anything.

"Excuse me miss, but I would like to buy one of those beautiful roses. For my date." He gestured toward me.

Her smile left and she immediately looked contrite, although she did glance briefly back and forth between the two of us. I could feel my skin getting hot and knew I was blushing at the fuss he was making.

"Of course sir," she murmured, quickly handing Jasper a rose, accepting his money and then slipping away with a quiet, "Have a nice evening."

After she was gone, Jasper fingered the stem of the rose and looked over at me. All the tension had drained from his face and his gentle, happy smile was back. He presented the rose to me.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Edward. Thank you for taking a chance on me."

I couldn't believe he was thanking me for taking a chance on _him_. It should be me thanking him for taking a chance on _me_.

I reached for the rose and just smiled back in wonder.

**~xo~xo~**

We stayed, talking for hours until the restaurant closed. As Jasper drove me back home, the nerves started again. I wasn't sure what to do, what Jasper was expecting. Do I invite him in? Would he take that as an invitation for . . . sex? We had barely touched so far, and we hadn't even kissed yet. I didn't deny I was fiercely attracted to Jasper and if he did come in, and things got . . . heated, I knew I would give in without much persuading. Flashes of my early dates with Garrett crept through my brain. How fast we had moved, how quickly I had given myself to him . . . and how horrible it had all ended.

My heart sunk a little. I knew I couldn't do that again. And if that was what Jasper was expecting . . . well, I decided I'd better enjoy these last few moments with him because this night—this one perfect night—might be all I got with him.

All too soon we were at my house. Jasper walked me up to my door, and then we both stopped. He turned to face me and I couldn't breathe, fearful of what would come next.

He gazed at me intently. "Edward, did you have a good time tonight?" he whispered into the dark.

That was an easy question to answer. "I had a wonderful time, Jasper. This has been the best Valentine's Day I've ever had."

He broke out into a slow, gentle smile and then leaned in and brushed his lips ever so lightly against mine. I could feel a warm tingle over my whole body, just from that delicate touch of his lips.

He pulled away just enough so he could speak. "Me, too," he breathed, the warm air ghosting across my lips.

He straightened up and pulled back farther. "Good night Edward, sweet dreams."

And then he turned and walked back toward his car. I was so dumbfounded and relieved and tingly-happy, I just stood and watched until he drove off.

**~xo~xo~**

The next morning I woke slowly. I cracked opened one eye and the first thing I saw was the red rose still laying on my nightstand from the night before. All of the memories of last night came flooding back and I felt myself grinning stupidly into the pillow. It hadn't been a dream.

I was just coming out of the shower when my phone buzzed. It was a text from Jasper.

**Just wanted to say good morning, beautiful. Can't stop thinking about our date. J**

Later in the afternoon he called and asked if I wanted to go out again next weekend. And I spent the rest of the weekend spontaneously grinning and feeling the warm flush in my chest.

Until, I started getting ready for bed Sunday night. Suddenly I began to worry about seeing Jasper the next day. At work. In front of our colleagues, in front of the kids. I didn't know how to react. I was afraid my feelings for him would be too obvious to everyone. I mean, what should I do when I saw him? If I smile at him when we say hello will it give people ideas? I knew some of these thoughts were just crazy overreaction, but I couldn't help it.

I didn't sleep well that night and the blaring of the alarm came early. So in my sleepless fog, I wasn't paying enough attention when I turned down one of the school hallways and saw Jasper heading my direction. We were both surrounded by kids chattering away and heading to their classrooms. There was really no route of escape; I was trapped. Somehow I kept moving as he headed my direction.

My breath hitched the closer he got, but I ended up having nothing to worry about. As Jasper passed by me, he simply nodded his head toward me, smiled briefly and spoke a quick greeting: "Good morning Mr. Cullen."

"Good morning, Mr. Whitlock." I answered back, though he was already past me. It all happened so fast no one else even paid us any attention and if they had they wouldn't have seen anything more than two work colleagues saying hello. I let a breath out. _Okay. This would be okay._

I put everything out of my mind for the morning as I concentrated on my kids and their lessons. Once I'd walked them to the lunchroom and was headed to the lounge for my own lunch, I started tensing again. Would I be able to get through an entire lunch break sitting with him like nothing had changed?

When I got to the teachers' lounge, he wasn't even there yet. As usual it was pretty quiet except for the snooty Tanya-Irina-Kate trifecta sitting at their table across the room. I sat down at our usual table and started into my lunch. The door opened and I forced myself not to look up, I kept facing forward. Soon I saw his body in front of me as he pulled out the chair across from me to sit down.

Our eyes met at the same time. His flicked down briefly to my lips and then back up to look me in the eye again.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hi," I answered back with a small smile.

It felt like the space between us was crackling with this intense electricity, a combination of our feelings for each other and the knowledge that we had a special secret only between ourselves.

The moment passed quickly and Jasper finally looked away and started chattering away about classes. And just like that things were back to normal, to anyone who might have been watching.

**~xo~xo~**

The next couple of weeks flew by in a haze. Jasper and I talked on the phone a lot and went on three more dates. Simple things—movies, the art museum, dinners. Gentle touches grew to holding hands, which lead to heated goodnight kisses and frantic making out in the car. Jasper was taking things so slow, I was both amazed and thrilled.

Then for our fourth date Jasper invited me over to his place. He'd make dinner and we could just hang out and watch the basketball game. A little shiver crept up my spine, but of course I said yes. This would be the first time we would be spending any length of time in either of each other's homes. It would be very easy for things to get out of control very quickly and I . . . I didn't know how I felt about that just yet.

But as always, my fears got ahead of me. When Jasper opened his door I was greeted with an enthusiastic full body hug and a quick kiss before he moved aside to let me in.

He was finishing up dinner in the kitchen—homemade pizzas and salad—and told me to feel welcome to look around, make myself at home.

Jasper just lived in a small apartment and it was very much him—casual, simple, not cluttered and very comfortable. Just the essentials.

The game was already on and when the pizzas were ready we ate casually on the floor in the living room. After dinner we finished watching the game while curled up on the couch. Honestly, I'm not a huge basketball fan so between feeling full from the wonderful food and the two glasses of wine I'd had, and being wrapped up in Jasper's warm arms, I started to doze off somewhere during the last quarter of the game.

I awoke to warm breath and soft lips against my neck, slowly moving their way up to nibble on my earlobe. I smiled as I opened my eyes and craned to look at Jasper.

"Ah, he wakes!"

"Sorry." I stifled a yawn. "It must have been the wine."

"Well, I'm glad you're not down for the count, we haven't had dessert yet."

"Dessert?"

Jasper's eyes got darker and he had this mischievous grin on his face. He shifted me so I was half laying on the couch, my back against the arm rest. He leaned over me and before I could take a breath, his lips were on mine, caressing them and molding softly to them. I closed my eyes as the heat flowed from my lips and through my body. God, he tasted so good and I just couldn't get enough. I felt that warning tingle in the back of me somewhere but I gave myself over to the moment, just wanting to be kissed by Jasper, just wanting to feel his hands on me.

The kiss grew more heated as our lips parted and our tongues tangled with each other. Jasper finally broke away, hurriedly tugged at my sweater, lifting it over my head in a flash and tossing it somewhere to the floor. I groaned loudly as he kissed and licked down my chest, my mind lost in the haze of sensation. He had slowly been palming my cock through my jeans and it had been so long since anyone else had touched me like this, even through clothing, that I was afraid I was going to explode right there.

When his mouth reached the barrier of my jeans he made fast work of unbuttoning and unzipping me, shoving my jeans and boxers down forcefully.

"Umm, Christ, Edward, you've been holding out on me."

I opened my eyes to see him staring lustfully at my hard cock, now pointing straight up against my stomach. Then his eyes looked up at mine with a pleading, predatory look.

"Please tell me I can touch you, Edward," He whispered.

_Fuck, he wanted me to speak? Words?_ Luckily parts of my brain worked on autopilot.

"Yes . . . please, Jasper . . . ARRRRghghgh Fuck!" All Jasper had needed was that first yes and he had dove in, stroking me in his hand, licking up the length of my cock and then swallowing me in his mouth. I could feel his lips gliding up and down over my cock, sucking me in deeper. God, his mouth felt like heaven and all I could do was groan incoherently and fist his hair in my hand. I wanted it to last forever, but it had been so long since I had been with someone—since Garrett—I was just lucky I had lasted this long.

"Jasper . . . I can't . . . oh God, I'm gonna . . . ."

Suddenly his mouth let go of my cock with a pop. I looked up and he was ripping his shirt off and fumbling with his own jeans. He let out a big sigh as he pushed his jeans down his thighs and freed himself. Holy hell. Jasper's cock was just as perfect and beautiful as he was, long and thick. He reached down and stroked himself a few times and I groaned out loud, all the heat in my body heading southward at the sight of him.

Jasper smirked at me. He leaned over to cover me with his body, nestling between my open legs. "Sorry, I was about to come in my pants and I couldn't let that happen. You're so wild, Edward, when you let go."

He lowered his hips at that moment so that our cocks slid together and I was gone. I writhed and arched under him and moaned for more. Our hands were everywhere, all over each other, just wanting to touch as much skin as we could. Our hips ground together, and unfortunately it only took a couple of thrusts before my cock jerked and I was coming and coming—I swore I had never come so hard and so fast in my life. Well, not since high school anyway.

"Edward, fuck . . . !" Suddenly Jasper let out a loud growl and I felt him pulse against me, spilling more warm wetness between us.

We both lay there for a few minutes, our chests vibrating against each other as our breathing came back to normal. And as my head began to clear again, I realized what we'd just done and—although I was feeling very happy and satisfied—my nerves were starting to rear their head again.

Jasper shifted up on his elbow and stared down at me with a sparkle in his eye. His face was still flushed and a little thrill went through me at the thought that I'd made him that happy. His finger lightly traced a path down my chest and down toward my thigh. "Wow," he breathed. "Sorry that was so . . . quick, but I think we both needed that." His finger kept traveling, lower, beneath my balls. He leaned his face in closer to me. "But we've got lots of time for slow, later." At that same moment I felt his finger circle my entrance. His touch was feather light and he wasn't being forceful at all. But my body and my brain reacted on instinct.

I immediately closed my legs and squirmed up to a sitting position. This caused Jasper to shift, falling backward so his butt hit the couch. I could feel his gaze on me, but I couldn't look up to face him.

"Edward, are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"

My head was a mess and I didn't know what to do so I just sat there silently. Part of me was yelling at myself to get up and leave, to run away. I was so embarrassed. But the other part of me that was so drawn to Jasper, wouldn't let me move.

And Jasper wouldn't let me move either. He brought washcloths from the bathroom so we could clean ourselves and then we put our clothes back on. Once we were dressed and sitting apart from each other on the couch, he made me tell him everything. He already knew that Garrett had cheated on me, but I told him everything else. How we met, how hot and fast it had been between us, how I had let myself get swept up in him. I guess there was still some fear in me, I didn't want to make that mistake again. I didn't want to ruin things with Jasper.

Jasper reached over stroked gently along my jaw. "Edward, look at me. I'm sorry he treated you that way. He's a complete fool to throw someone like you away like that." His blue eyes bore into mine intently as he spoke, as if we were the only two people on the planet. "But I am not Garrett and I never will be. I don't cheat and I don't lie and I appreciate what's mine. And there's absolutely no rush, Edward, we've got all the time in the world. We go at your pace, whatever your comfortable with, okay? I promise I'm not going anywhere."

I don't know what I did to have Cupid bestow Jasper to me, but somehow I had apparently won the love lottery. Jasper meant every last word he said to me that day. We continued dating for several weeks, and while there were a few times we both went home aching and frustrated, there were also many other times we managed to satisfy ourselves with touching and fondling and hand jobs and blow jobs, and well, just about everything else besides actual sex. Jasper never pushed and never complained though there were a few times I could see he was fighting the urge to just flip me over and fuck me. But he always kissed me lovingly afterward and never said a word.

Frankly, the more and more we were together, the more I wanted to be with him too. I just had this mental barrier that I couldn't get over. He and I would be together, in the heat of the moment and I would think to myself, _yes, now!_ And as soon as I thought those words I would get a cold shiver all over and I would break out into a sweat. I was beginning to feel like a freak. What red-blooded man has an even hotter red-blooded man as his boyfriend and doesn't want to have sex with him? _Damn you Garrett._

One Saturday night we decided to go out for a light dinner and then dancing at one of the local gay clubs we both liked. Neither one of us had been there in a long time and definitely not since we had started dating each other.

I was never big on the whole gay bar scene, but I liked to go once in a while. And I was always more comfortable when I already had a hot man to dance with and didn't have to participate in the whole "meat market" aspect that is a gay bar.

When we walked in, there was already a large crowd of men packing the place—writhing and sweaty on the dance floor, lining the bar and the areas around the edge of the dance floor, and of course, streaming steadily in and out of the back room.

Jasper and I headed straight for the bar to get a drink. He held my hand the entire time, so it was obvious we were together. But that didn't stop all the other men from staring at Jasper with blatant looks of lust. I was waiting for Jasper to flirt or smile or acknowledge these men and these looks in some way. But he seemed oblivious to them. His only smile or flirty look was directed at me when he handed me my drink.

"Hey sexy, come here often?" He spoke directly in my ear to be heard over the pounding "thumpa-thumpa" dance music. "I bet you look so hot shakin' your ass out on the dance floor, stud."

I slowly turned my head to look at him, wondering if they had given him pure grain alcohol in his drink. He winked at me, then slowly let his eyes travel up and down my body, ending with an exaggerated eyebrow waggle as he smirked at me. I shook my head as I burst out laughing. Jasper was crazy sometimes but that's why he was good for me. He didn't take things too seriously. And he wanted me to have fun.

A few songs (and a couple more drinks later) we finally ventured on to the dance floor. Once amidst the throngs of horny dancing men, Jasper pulled me close to him. Our bodies were pressed so tightly together I could feel him growing harder the more we danced. His hands slid down to cup my ass and grind me into him. I threw my head back and let out a groan, knowing no one could hear me over the music. I'd never been one for dancing much at these places but I was having a great time tonight dancing with Jasper. I loved being in his arms.

And then the magical moment was broken. This big hulk of a guy in a tight T-shirt comes right up behind Jasper and starts grinding up against his ass. He put his big meaty paws on Jasper's hips and tried to pull him away from me. Jasper turned around and not so gently pushed the man's hands away and says something to him. Jasper turned back towards me and reached his arms out to grab me again, when this skinny little bare-chested twink suddenly sneaks in between us and starts rubbing his hands all over Jasper's chest. Jasper's face contorts and he yells something at the twink as he pushes him away. He has a disgusted look on his face as he grabbed my hand and nodded his head toward the bar.

"Man, I forgot how ruthless these guys are. No respect when they see two guys dancing together. You want to just get out of here?"

I nodded, but indicated I needed to hit the bathroom first. Jasper opted to wait for me by the bar. When I came back I saw Jasper being accosted again—this time by a very attractive, dark-haired guy. The guy had his arm around Jasper and was being very friendly with him. My stomach flipped a little and I hung back a bit to see what Jasper would do. Jasper shook him off but not quite as roughly as those other guys from the dance floor. And the two of them still continued talking. Then Jasper saw me, and he smiled and waved me over. Once I reached them, Jasper immediately put his arm tightly around my waist.

"Peter," he said, "this is my boyfriend, Edward. Edward, this is my ex, Peter." The word _ex_, reverberated in my brain for a minute but was soon overpowered by another word—_boyfriend_. I didn't have time to process that word because the first word—the _ex_—was speaking to us.

Peter gave me the eyeball, from top to bottom. "Hmm, Jasper. _Very_ nice. So glad you've found the 'domestic bliss' you always wanted." Then he lightly touched my face before snuggling up to Jasper with his arm around him again. "Are you sure you boys wouldn't be up for a little fun? A little 'sharing' perhaps, for the evening? You know how hot we are together J." That last sentence was whispered in Jasper's ear but I still heard it all.

Jasper frowned at him, and physically lifted Peter's arm off of him. "Peter, we're over, you know that. No playing, no 'old times' sake' and definitely no sharing! I'm sure though, that you will have no shortage of other boys to 'play' with tonight, Peter. You never did."

Jasper, arm still around me, tugged on my waist. "Come on, Edward. Let's go."

Peter just rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine, fine. Have a good evening boys."

"You too, Peter," Jasper called out over his shoulder as we headed toward the door.

Jasper was quiet the entire way back to the car. Once we got in, he just sat there staring at the steering wheel, making no move to put the key in. Finally he turned to me. "Edward, I'm sorry this evening didn't turn out so great."

"What do you mean, it was _great_ fun watching you get mauled by horny men and seeing you beat them off with a stick." I tried to bring some levity and make Jasper smile. He did, but just barely.

"And Peter?" I asked quietly. I had told him all about Garrett. Whether I wanted to hear it or not, I suppose I deserved to hear about this Peter.

"Peter." Jasper snorted and rolled his eyes. "Peter was my last ex but we broke up a long time before I met you. As if you couldn't tell, Peter's not really into monogamy. He wanted an open relationship and I tried that for a while—we were always absolutely safe about everything, by the way—but I just wanted more. Once I find someone I'm interested in, I don't need to be with other guys. I don't _want_ to be with other guys. Isn't that the whole point of being with someone?"

We were both kind of quiet as Jasper drove me home. Jasper's words kept running through my head. What he'd told me when I told him about Garrett—"_I don't cheat and I don't lie and I appreciate what's mine."_ That made sense after his experience with Peter. "_Once I find someone I'm interested in, I don't need to be with other guys. I don't want to be with other guys."_

And then there was— "_This is my boyfriend, Edward." _Boyfriend, he'd called me his _boyfriend._ My whole body internally jumped for joy at that. I mean, he and I had never really discussed what we were. But we were dating exclusively. So I guess that would make us . . . boyfriends. Still, it was nice to hear Jasper refer to us as such.

When we got to my place I started to get out of the car before I realized Jasper was sitting inside, the car still running. I poked my head back in the car. "Aren't you coming inside?"

There was hope in Jasper's eyes but I could see he was trying to restrain it. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

As soon as we were inside, Jasper was apologizing again. "Edward I'm sorry about running into Peter, I wasn't expecting to see him there . . . ."

I cut him off. "You introduced me as your boyfriend. Did you mean that?"

Jasper looked at me with surprise. "Well, of course, Edward."

_He meant it. He really meant it. _

I crushed my lips to his, my force knocking him back against the door. He moaned at the intensity of the kiss. "I take it you liked that hmm?" he breathed, chuckling.

"Mmm . . . ." I opened my eyes to meet his. "Hell yes."

Jasper let out a growl as he wrapped his arms around me and claimed my lips with his, biting my lower lip and causing me to moan loudly. I clutched his shoulders, and gripped his hair. My blood was boiling and I just couldn't get enough of him. I needed to feel him, to feel his skin against mine, to feel his whole body against mine. And that still didn't feel like enough. I could feel Jasper's hard cock through his jeans pressing against mine, and fire raged through my lower body. _I wanted to feel him inside me_. I suddenly realized that for the first time, there was no nervous anticipation cock blocking me. I had no fear that Jasper was going to go anywhere, no fear that we were moving too fast, no fear that my heart was going to get broken. Jasper's actions and his words tonight had chased all of those away. He wanted me and I wanted him, oh how I wanted him. _Now_.

Jasper was fumbling with my buttons while trying to walk me backwards towards the couch.

"Wait, stop."

Jasper, the perfect gentleman as always, ceased all motion and let out a heaving breath. I knew he was as revved up as I was and was probably expecting me to send him home alone again. Instead I pulled on his belt loops and started leading him down the hall.

His eyes grew wide. "Edward . . . ."

I let my smile be my answer as we continued on through the doorway of my bedroom.

"Edward . . . !" His tone was lower this time and his breathing was picking up.

I still said nothing, slowly undoing each button of his shirt.

"Edward . . . !" This time there was just a hint of a threat in his voice. I had reached the last button on his shirt, and it fell open to reveal his bare chest. His hands moved up to cover mine, stopping me before I could move any lower. "Are you sure?" he spoke quietly.

I stepped closer so that our bodies were touching. "Yes," I whispered in his ear. "I'm sure, Jasper. I'm ready. I want you." My hands unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, and I reached in and wrapped my hand around his warm, hard cock. Jasper's head leaned back and he let out a long, low moan. I pushed his jeans and briefs down and then kneeled to the floor. I stroked him twice before slowly enveloping him in my mouth, licking and sucking and worshipping him. Jasper gripped my hair and before long was begging me to stop. As I pulled off and looked up at him, he groaned again.

"Fuck, you look so hot right now. I fully appreciate what you're doin' down there baby, but I'm not going to last long enough to fuck you if you keep it up."

He pulled me up so fast I stumbled and fell back on the bed, which was right where I wanted to be. We became a tangle of limbs and hands, ripping clothing off, touching and stroking any bare area of skin we could reach. By the time we were naked we were already hot and sweaty. Jasper lay on top of me, our bodies entwined and as we paused to catch our breath, our urgency changed into something different, something still primal but more sacred. My body felt like it was alive for the first time in a very long time and I never wanted it to end, I wanted to stay like this with Jasper forever.

Jasper lovingly stroked every inch of my body, tracing patterns up and down my arms and my chest. His touch was both tender and electric at the same time.

Finally Jasper looked down at me. "Last chance. Are you ready, baby?"

I was already certain in my choice, but if I weren't, the love shining out of Jasper's eyes would have sealed my decision.

"I'm more than ready Jasper, I want to feel you and me . . . together."

He gave me a tender, slow-burning kiss before shifting above me. He lifted my legs and soon I felt his slick fingers teasing me, working into me slowly. Jasper was patient and took his time. I literally bucked and moaned when he hit that spot. I almost came right there. It had been so long for me, but oh it felt so good. It wasn't long before I was begging.

"Please, oh please Jasper . . . ."

I watched as he put the condom on and stroked himself a few times with lube, before he gently moved over me. There was the usual bit of pain and stretching as he slowly entered me. My body arched involuntarily and I tried to remember to breathe. Oh God, I felt so full. But I remembered it was Jasper, _my_ Jasper and my whole body just relaxed. I opened my eyes to see his face inches from mine.

"Are you okay?" his voice was rough as his jaw clenched around his words.

I brushed my fingertips across his cheek "Wonderful," I answered quietly.

"God, baby, you feel so good."

I shifted my hips and he groaned. And then he was moving inside me and I was lost. Electric shocks took over my body every time he went deeper and deeper. Desperate, I wrapped my legs tighter around him, I clutched at his shoulders to hold him to me. I wanted to crawl inside him. I was burning and he was water. Our moans and cries echoed off the walls and surrounded us.

Finally I couldn't take any more, my chest was about to burst. Jasper started to shake above me, both of us ready to shatter apart. He reached down and stroked my cock, barely getting a hold of it before I was coming all over my chest. And then I heard him call out my name as he shuddered and pulsed inside of me.

He collapsed on top of me and neither of us moved for what felt like hours, not wanting to get up and not having the energy. Eventually we got up just enough to clean up. We didn't speak a word, just grinned at each other like fools. Then we climbed into bed, Jasper spooning around me. "Thank you, Edward," I heard him whisper just as he dropped off to sleep. _No, thank you, Jasper,_ I thought, as I closed my eyes, safe and warm and happier than I'd been in a very long time.

The next morning I woke slowly, stretching and feeling sore muscles that hadn't been used in a while. I smiled as I remembered why they were sore. I turned over, my head burrowing into my pillow, as I finally opened my eyes. Jasper was already awake and staring at me, a lazy smile on his face.

"Morning, sleepyhead." His voice was still rough from sleep so I knew he couldn't have been awake very long.

"Good morning, Mr. Whitlock." He chuckled at my formal greeting, as his fingers ran up and down my arm.

"Last night was amazing, Edward. I love you so much, you know that right?"

_Okay, now I was awake._ I think my heart just pounded up into my throat. "I do now," I croaked.

"I just needed to say that." His eyes moved down my body. He was still smiling, he was so relaxed, it was obvious he wasn't expecting or requiring to hear the words back. He just really wanted me to know.

"Jasper?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you too."

He glanced up at me then, his smile growing wider and I thought I would never see anything more beautiful again.

**~~ * V * ~~**

** _**Three years later ****_

I checked myself in the mirror one last time as I straightened my tie. I got distracted by the mess I saw behind me in the mirror. "Jasper! You left your wet towel on the floor again!" Getting no response I just shook my head. Jasper and I had been living together for almost three years now, and I was used to his lackadaisical attitude about things—at least that's what I chose to call it, it sounded so much better than calling your lover "sloppy."

After that night at the club that had changed our relationship, it only took a few months until we moved in together—well, Jasper moved in with _me_, since I already had a house and he just had an apartment. We'd redecorated it though, I wanted to make sure the house reflected Jasper too and not just me—that it became our house, our home.

We were currently getting ready to go out to dinner—for Valentine's Day. God, how I used to hate that day with a fiery passion. It had always been so unlucky for me. Until the year Jasper had walked into my life. He'd managed to get me to agree to go out on a date _on_ Valentine's Day! I was so scared it was a bad idea, a bad day (for me, anyway) to start a relationship on. But it ended up being one of the best dates of my life.

My opinion on the holiday changed so much, that I now tended to go a bit overboard on all the stuff I hated before. Right now there was a large pink and red heart balloon bouquet (for Jasper, of course) sitting on the kitchen counter. Along with a large mushy Valentine card, a heart-shaped box of chocolates and a bouquet of roses. Jasper always just shook his head and indulged me.

I knew it was silly, but one of the reasons I always hated Valentine's Day before was because I was always alone. And now that I had someone to shower with love and gifts, well . . . I couldn't resist. I knew how special it was to be in love.

Jasper went the complete opposite route from my outlandish displays and I never ever wanted him to change. His valentine to me was the same every year, the same as it had been that very first year we met. It was a simple heart cut out of red paper, with a brief message and a piece of chocolate taped to the inside.

I finished with my tie and turned the light off, heading into the living room. I could see the large balloons from all the way down the hall. Okay, so I may have gone a little more overboard than usual this year. Jasper had been acting so strange for the past two weeks. He'd be his normal self and then all of a sudden he'd get this weird faraway look in his eye. Usually that meant he had something on his mind. He'd been quieter too, lately. It was getting to be so frequent I could admit to being a little worried about whatever was going on with him. So somehow I thought big red puffy balloons would make things all better.

Jasper was standing with his back to me, looking out the window. He kept shuffling form one foot to the other.

"Ready to go, babe?"

I started for the front door, when he called out behind me.

"Wait, Edward."

When I turned around he was sitting on the couch, his head down. My stomach flip-flopped and a sudden chill hit me so bad my whole body felt like ice. Oh God, Jasper looked awful. This wasn't going to be good. He'd been so distracted lately, withdrawn. I remembered after Garrett, how I'd looked back on the last months of our relationship and found he had been acting the same way. He'd already checked out from the relationship and I had just failed to notice. _Oh God, no, I couldn't do this again._ He was going to tell me his feelings had changed. Or he'd found someone else.

I walked slowly over to the couch. As I did I passed my ridiculous grouping of Valentine's day paraphernalia and realized Jasper hadn't given me his paper heart yet. That was when I really almost lost it. It was a sign. We were over.

He glanced up at me and patted the couch next to him. "Have a seat, Edward. I need to say something."

My gut was twisting and I was going numb.

"I was going to do this at the restaurant, but, well . . . I've been thinking and planning it for so long now, I just can't wait any longer." He cleared his throat and reached behind him, under one of the couch pillows and pulled out a plain red paper heart.

Oh God, he was going to break it off with our special valentine? That was just downright cruel.

My hands shook as I reached for it and forced myself to open it and read the words he'd written.

_Edward, _

_Happy Valentine's my love. Many years ago I asked you if you would be my Valentine. And now you are, and I couldn't be happier. So I guess it's time to ask for something else. _

_Edward, will you promise to be my Valentine forever? Will you marry me?_

_Love always, Jasper._

_P.S. Please say yes. _

And there at the bottom, instead of a piece of chocolate, was taped a real platinum ring.

A ring. _Marry me._ I blinked as I just stared at it. Finally I found my voice. "This . . . this is why you've been so quiet lately? You were planning . . . this?"

Jasper smiled tentatively. "Yes, I was nervous, trying to make sure it all went perfectly and then making sure I got the ring in time."

I couldn't help myself, I burst out laughing. Jasper got a pained look on his face, I knew I'd better explain myself quickly. "I . . . I thought you were breaking up with me!"

His brows furrowed. "Breaking up with you? Why would you . . . ? I'm sorry Edward, I was keeping a little bit of a distance on purpose, because I was afraid I was going to spill the secret."

I couldn't believe I had thought, even for those brief few minutes, that Jasper was going to leave me.

Jasper cleared his throat again. "Um, Edward? You haven't given me an answer?"

Another uncontrollable laugh came out of me. I could feel the ear-splitting smile on my face as I turned to look at him.

"Oh Jasper . . . yes, of course, I'll marry you."

**~~ * V * ~~**

_**** Ten Years Later ****_

"Hey there kiddo, you need some help?"

I looked down at the adorable boy with blond curls just like his dad's. I swear my heart squeezed every time. Jasper and I had been so shocked and thrilled when his sister had offered to be a surrogate for us. We'd been poring through the mounds of paperwork for the adoption agency, frustrated because it seemed like it was going to be such a long waiting process. And then Rose had been over for Thanksgiving and saw the pile of papers and just matter-of-factly offered. As if it was no big deal. So with Rose's egg and my sperm we'd ended up with a child that was truly biologically made up of both Jasper and I. Modern science was so amazing sometimes.

The last seven years had flown by. It seemed like yesterday we were bringing him home from the hospital and now he was sitting at the dining room table trying to write his valentines for his class party tomorrow. _Trying_ being the operative word. Right now he was biting his lip like he did when he was working something out in that little brain of his. There were only three sitting off to the side in envelopes with names on the outside. The rest of the valentines were spread out in a large pile in front of him.

"Riley?" I prodded. I sat down and rifled through the pile of valentines.

"I'm trying to decide which one to send to Victoria."

Oh dear, if he was picking a specific card for each kid we were going to be here for a while. Suddenly his face lit up and he swiped one and started writing on the back of it.

"Ah, did you find the right one?"

"Yep, I gave her the Superman one. It's my favorite."

"Wow, your favorite huh? That sounds pretty special." Uh oh, there was the biting lip again.

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"You and Papa like each other right?"

"Yes," I answered slowly, unsure where this conversation was going.

"And your both boys, right?"

"Yes."

"Did you ever like a girl?"

I was still puzzled by all the questions and scared where his little mind was going. "Um, well, I had lots of friends who were girls."

His voice got really small. "I like Victoria."

My eyebrows rose. Oh. So that's where we were going. "Okay son, well, that's great. Is that why you wanted to pick out a special valentine for her?"

He shook his little head up and down really fast. "Is that okay?" he asked slowly.

Aww . . . my little man. There was the heart squeeze again. "Of course that's okay, Riley. You can like whomever you want to like, boys or girls. It doesn't matter to me or Papa or anyone else, only you."

He smiled.

"Do you want me to help you? I could put them in the envelopes for you as you write them?"

"Cool!"

Cool. I smiled down at our little guy. As he handed the one for Victoria over to me, I couldn't help but peek at what he'd written on hers before I stuffed it into the envelope. _"XOXO Love, Riley" _Yep, God help him, but he was definitely my son.

I was laying in bed reading when I heard the front door. Soon Jasper was collapsing on the bed next to me, clothes and all. About five years ago, Jasper had finally moved on to teach at a local college. And he loved every minute of it, except for the occasional night class he was required to teach.

I reached over and ran my fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp a gently as I went.

"Ummm, that feels so good." His voice was muffled by the pillow

I smiled. "Rough night?"

He sighed. "Nah, not more than usual. Just long. I hate these fucking night classes."

"Really?" I smirked.

He opened one eye to look at me. "Don't you smirk at me," he warned.

Actually I hated those fucking night classes too, I missed him when he wasn't home.

He stood up and went into the bathroom. I heard the water run as he got ready for bed. He came out and started taking his clothes off.

"So what I'd miss tonight?"

"Oh, not much. Our son is straight."

His head whipped around to look at me with an amused look on his face.

"And how did this topic come up?"

"Valentines for the class party tomorrow. He wrote a special one for Victoria."

Jasper nodded his head in understanding. Then suddenly he straightened up. "Wait, he likes girls already? He's only seven! Wasn't it just last week all girls had cooties?"

I chuckled. "Yep. Next week he'll be asking for the car keys to take her out parking."

Jasper groaned. "Ugh. I don't even want to think about it. I'm leaving the sex talk up to you."

"Oh gee, thanks!"

"Well hell, I don't know anything about sex with girls."

"Like I do? I'm sure Rose would always let us borrow Emmett to come talk to him."

"Oh God, no, that's even scarier!"

I laughed out loud again. "Well, I think we've got at least a couple of weeks yet before we have to worry about it, we'll come up with something."

Jasper pulled back the covers on his side to get into bed when he saw something red on the pillow.

"Hmm . . . and what is this?"

He sat against the headboard and flipped over the red paper heart. Glued to the front was a small Superman valentine.

He raised his eyebrows as he looked at me. "Edward, you did not steal a valentine from our son did you?"

I rolled my eyes. "It was one of the leftovers." I didn't tell him I might have hid it on the bottom of the pile so it was sure to be a leftover.

He opened the small card and read the writing.

_Jasper,_

_You have always been my own personal superhero. Please be my valentine?_

_Love, Edward_

_XOXO _

Jasper smiled and leaned over to give me a kiss. "Aww . . . Always baby, always."

Always.

As I lay curled up in Jasper's arms I couldn't help reflecting over the evening. Helping Riley with the valentines brought back the memories of my class valentines when I was little. I wondered what Bobby Bukowski was doing now . . . ?

Whatever he was doing, I was certain he couldn't be as happy as I was. All those years I was so miserable every February. The turn of the calendar page no longer made me cringe. I had my own personal Valentine now. For always.

**~~ * V * ~~**


End file.
